Shift: Managing Your Emotions—So They Don't Manage You

Chapter 9 explores the critical transition from understanding emotional regulation tools to implementing them effectively in daily life. Kross opens with an account of Navy SEALs preparing for a high-stakes mission, highlighting how their thorough planning for contingencies enables automatic responses to unexpected situations. This military example serves as a metaphor for emotional regulation: The goal is to respond to emotional challenges swiftly and effectively, like a “NASCAR pit crew” for emotions (194).

The chapter introduces a psychological framework called WOOP (Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan), which combines two independently developed concepts: mental contrasting and implementation intentions. Mental contrasting, developed by psychologist Gabriele Oettingen, involves visualizing a desired future while acknowledging obstacles. Contrary to popular belief, mere positive visualization was found to decrease goal achievement by creating a false sense of accomplishment. Oettingen discovered that balancing fantasy with realistic obstacle assessment proves more effective. Meanwhile, her husband, Peter Gollwitzer, developed implementation intentions—structured “if-then” plans that create automatic responses to anticipated situations. Together, these approaches form WOOP, a comprehensive tool for translating emotional regulation knowledge into practical action.

WOOP’s practical framework resonates with contemporary psychological research on habit formation and automated responses, though Kross’s approach simplifies complex neurological processes. The chapter acknowledges that emotional regulation is highly individualized, with no one-size-fits-all solution—a nuanced perspective that distinguishes this work from more prescriptive self-help texts.